Relationship expert Ellen Gootblatt's recent lecture at Buffalo State College was unlike many others. The strawberries and whipped cream served as refreshments put the usual array of pizza and junk food to shame. And while many students might have been expecting a lecture titled “Sex, Passion and Intimacy” to be racy, it was surprisingly conservative. “Take your sweet time,” was a point that Gootblatt frequently stressed.

Before she began, the Brooklyn-accented Gootblatt asked the audience to write down questions on index cards about love, relationships, and men and women's issues. After glancing at the cards she said jokingly, “You need me desperately; I am here.”

Using personal anecdotes to get her point across, Gootblatt offered advice for those who are both single and attached, such as:

• Relationships are meant to be easy . Don't change yourself for anyone.
• It's more important to know what you don't want in a relationship than what you do want.
• Ask yourself, “Am I enhanced or diminished when I am with my partner?”

Amy Viola, a senator for the United Students Government (USG), first heard Gootblatt speak at a leadership conference she attended last November in Florida. She was so impressed that she asked USG to bring Gootblatt to Buffalo State.

“Ellen Gootblatt is an empowering and contagious woman. She speaks with so much drive and intensity. Gootblatt really makes you understand how to be the best person you can be,” Viola said.

Buffalo State student Clare Mac Clellan agrees, “Ellen made me feel confident about where I am in my life right now and gave me confidence in what is out in the world waiting for me.”

Gootblatt has authored two books:

• “Men Are Worth the Trouble: Translating, Understanding, Appreciating and Celebrating Men”
• “Meeting, Dating, Relating and Mating: 250 Important Questions to Ask Before You Go Further In a Relationship”

In the past she hosted a nationally syndicated radio show on WABC called Getting Together with Ellen Gootblatt.

After spending two years talking about love and relationships on her radio show, she resigned and now shares her advice with high school and college students across the country. And audience of about 40 attended this USG sponsored event which proved to be both humorous and tasteful.

Email: ickosl85@mail.buffalostate.edu